Ep 149: 7 Years Without Alcohol - A Celebration!

Today, I am celebrating something pretty incredible. July 21st, 2025, marked seven years since I had my last drink of alcohol–and let me tell you, I don’t miss it. Not even a little bit.

I don't miss waking up with headaches, or that fuzzy, slightly off feeling the morning after even one alcoholic beverage. I don't miss spending hundreds of dollars on wine and cocktails or the anxiety that would creep in the next day. Now, I can't imagine my life any other way. Over the past seven years, my relationship with myself has transformed in a way it never could have when I was numbing with alcohol on a regular basis. 

Here’s what I want you to know: You don't have to wait until you hit rock bottom to make a change. If you've been questioning your relationship with alcohol or you've been curious about what life looks like on the other side, this is the episode for you.

Click HERE to get the full show notes.

Transcript

Hey, this is Melissa Parsons, and you are listening to the Your Favorite You Podcast. I'm a certified life coach with an advanced certification in deep dive coaching. The purpose of this podcast is to help brilliant women like you with beautiful brains create the life you've been dreaming of with intentions. My goal is to help you find your favorite version of you by teaching you how to treat yourself as your own best friend.

If this sounds incredible to you and you want practical tips on changing up how you treat yourself, then you're in the right place. Just so you know, I'm a huge fan of using all of the words available to me in the English language, so please proceed with caution if young ears are around.

Well hello again beautiful humans, welcome back to Your Favorite You.

I am still your host, Melissa Parsons, and today I am celebrating something pretty incredible. July 21st, 2025 marked seven years since I had my last drink of alcohol. Seven fucking years, you guys, I have to tell you, I do not miss it. Not even a little bit, not even at all. If you've been listening to this podcast for a while, you might remember that I did an episode earlier on about my relationship with alcohol. A few years back, actually back in 2023 when I was approaching my five-year mark, well now I'm at seven years and I have even more to say about this topic, especially with all the recent evidence showing that actually no amount of alcohol is healthy for any of us.

So if you've been questioning your own relationship with alcohol, if you've been curious about what life looks like on the other side, or if you've been afraid that stopping drinking would somehow make your life boring or less fun, then this is the episode for you.

So when I recorded that episode about my five-year mark, I was already completely confident in my decision. I knew I was never going back to drinking, and these past two years have only solidified that confidence even more.

Now, I can't imagine my life any other way. And here's what's wild. Not only do I not miss alcohol, but I'm genuinely grateful every single day that I broke up with it. You know what I've gained in these seven years?

Pretty much everything, better sleep, clearer thinking, more energy, deeper relationships, more money in my bank account. Well, theoretically, there will be more money. I've found other ways to spend it.

And then most importantly, a relationship with myself that I could have never had when I was numbing out with wine or gin and tonics on a regular basis. And the ripple effects. I know I talk about the ripple effects a lot on this podcast, but oh my God, in this case, the ripple effects really have been incredible.

So one of the most beautiful unintended consequences of my decision to stop drinking is what happened with my hubby, Jon. So let me be completely honest here for the first few years after I stopped, he continued drinking and I had zero chill about it. I wanted him to stop drinking so badly. I could see how much better my life had gotten and I wanted that for him too. But I also wanted it for me. I wanted us to be, you know, kind of on a similar page and I wanted him to experience what I was experiencing. And so I had to get a lot of coaching around this. I had to learn how to let him make his own decision about alcohol without trying to control or manipulate him into stopping. I wasn't perfect at that. I will be honest. And I had to learn how to love him exactly as he was drinking, all while still holding space for what I wanted for our relationship, which was different. It was hard work, but it was so worth it.

And about two years ago, Jon made his own decision to stop drinking. He saw how much better my life had gotten and he wanted that for himself too. And he saw the consequences that drinking was having in his life and he didn't love it.

So our marriage is better now than it's ever been. We used to center our date nights around sitting at the bar, drinking, eating. We used to fight about the stupidest shit after we'd both had a few drinks. We used to wake up, you know, the next morning feeling slightly hungover and irritated with ourselves and with each other. And now we wake up clear-headed and connected. We have the most amazing giggle fests.

We laugh more than we ever did when we were drinking. And that's saying something because we've always been pretty funny together. I had so many fears when I first stopped drinking. The biggest one was that Jon and I would have nothing to do together. Like literally nothing. Our entire social life revolved around going out to dinner and sitting at the bar. Our vacations were centered around all-inclusive resorts where we could eat and drink ourselves into oblivion.

I was really afraid that without alcohol, we'd just sit there staring at each other with nothing to talk about. And it turns out that that fear was utter bullshit. We have more. More fun now than we ever did when we were drinking. We like to go on adventures. We have deep conversations. Like I said, we laugh a ton. We explore new places with clear heads and full presence.

My other big fear was that I would lose my sense of humor. If you know me at all, you know that being funny is kind of my thing. And I was convinced that alcohol made me wittier, more spontaneous, more entertaining. Also complete bullshit. It turns out I'm just as inappropriate and hilarious as I ever was. And maybe more so now because I actually remember the funny things they say. Instead of wondering the next day if I was funny or just drunk. One thing that's made this journey so much easier is how much the world has changed around alcohol in the past seven years.

When I first stopped drinking, the non-alcoholic options were pretty much limited to club soda with lime. Which I love, by the way, but it was limited to that. And now the alcohol industry has completely caught on to the fact that more and more people are questioning their relationship with alcohol. And there are some really yummy non-alcoholic beers, non-alcoholic wines, and even non-alcoholic spirits. So I'm talking about sophisticated mocktails that actually taste amazing, not just a virgin pina colada. Most of the time, I'm perfectly happy with water or tea when we're out, but occasionally, when we're at a nice restaurant with friends, I'll order a mocktail. It feels festive and special without any of the downside.

And you know what's beautiful? My friends have completely embraced this version of me. They don't make a big deal about the fact that I'm not drinking. They don't try to convince me to just have one. They don't act weird about it or treat me like I'm missing out on something. And it also turns out that many of the friends that I have made in these past seven years actually also don't drink. The people who love me for me are still here. And honestly, if someone had a problem with me not drinking, that would tell me way more about them than it would about me. Let's talk about the science for a minute because it's getting pretty interesting.

When I first stopped drinking seven years ago, the conventional wisdom was still that moderate drinking, especially red wine, could be good for you. While that evidence has completely shifted, study after study is now showing that there is no safe amount of alcohol- none, zero, zilch.

The World Health Organization has stated clearly that no level of alcohol consumption is safe for our health. And the studies are showing increased risk of cancers, heart disease, stroke, liver disease, and so many other health problems, even with what we used to consider “moderate” drinking. And you know what? I didn't need these studies to tell me how much better I feel without alcohol, but it's pretty validating to have the science back up what I've been experiencing in my own body for the past seven years.

Let me be really clear about what I don't miss about drinking because this list is long. The short answer and spoiler alert is everything. So I don't miss waking up with headaches. I don't miss that fuzzy slightly off feeling the morning after even one glass of wine or one alcoholic beverage.

I don't miss having to get up multiple times during the night to urinate. I don't miss the anxiety that would creep in the day after drinking. I don't miss saying really inappropriate things and then lying awake at night replaying the conversations and cringing.

I certainly don't miss the fights that Jon and I would have after we'd both been drinking. And I don't miss the shame spiral that would follow those fights. I don't miss spending hundreds of dollars on wine and cocktails when we went out to dinner.

I don't miss the calories from alcohol. I don't miss planning my day around when I could have my first drink. I don't miss the mental energy it took to monitor my drinking, counting drinks, making rules about when and how much I could drink, and then breaking those rules after I'd have some alcohol and then making new ones with my alcohol fuel brain.

I don't miss any of it. Really, seriously, not one single thing. And what I have gained is also, spoiler alert, everything. So I sleep like a baby now. Our bed tells me my sleep score, and I'm consistently above 85, and most nights I'm in the 90s. I wake up every morning feeling refreshed and clear. I have so much more energy. My anxiety levels are lower than really they've ever been. I'm definitely more present in my everyday life. I, for better or for worse, remember every conversation. I remember every laugh, every experience. And I really think I'm a better mom, a better wife, a better friend, just a better human. We definitely have saved thousands of dollars that, of course, I have invested back into myself, coaching, books, travel, experiences that actually nourish my soul instead of numbing it. And I've discovered what I actually like to do for fun. It turns out I love hiking and reading and playing games and having deep conversations and traveling to see new places, not just traveling to drink in new places.

So if you're listening to this and you're questioning your own relationship with alcohol, I want you to know that you don't have to wait until you hit some rock bottom to make a change. You don't have to qualify for a diagnosis of alcohol use disorder to decide that alcohol isn't serving you anymore.  If you're tired of how you feel after drinking, if you're tired of the anxiety and the sleep disruption and the money you're spending, if you're tired of the mental energy it takes to manage your drinking, you get to choose to change that relationship.

And if you're worried about what other people will think or how you have fun or what you'll do on dates with your partner. I'm here to tell you that all of those fears are most likely unfounded, just as mine were. Your real friends will support you. You will have more fun, not less. And if you have a partner, you and your partner will connect on a deeper level than you ever did over drinks. And then you know what's been absolutely incredible to witness?

How many of my clients have changed their relationship with alcohol as they've done the work to become a favorite version of themselves. It's not something that I specifically coach on, but it comes up naturally as they start prioritizing their wellbeing and paying attention to what actually lights them up and makes them feel good. Some of my clients have cut back significantly and some of them have stopped drinking altogether. And without fail, they report the same kinds of positive changes I experienced. So better sleep, more energy, clearer thinking, and improved relationships.

And just yesterday, I got a message from one of my clients that made my heart so full, she said that I could share it. And she said, I wanted to share a celebration. Yesterday was my family's annual summer picnic. We always get together to celebrate summer family birthdays. This was the party of the year when all of my grandparents were still living. There is typically much imbibing. These family events have been super tricky for me to navigate in the past with regard to making choices in line with my own personal health goals, while still enjoying my time with my family. I'm always finding myself caught up in either the social drinking norm there, or in buffering some of the family dynamics. Long story made short, I enjoyed eight hours on a hot summer's day yesterday with my extended family with zero alcohol, and I genuinely enjoyed myself and my family. And I feel great today.

You guys, when I got this message, it made me so happy. I remember these exact same fears. How will I navigate family events? How will I deal with social pressure? How will I manage difficult family dynamics without alcohol to buffer? And here's this beautiful woman discovering pretty much exactly what I discovered. You can actually enjoy these events more when you're fully present, when you're not using alcohol to cope, when you wake up the next day feeling great instead of feeling slightly ugh.

My clients are discovering that they're funnier, they're more creative, they're more present, and they're more themselves without the alcohol. They're realizing that the thing they thought was helping them was actually holding them back.

So here's what I know about making big changes in your life. They create ripples that extend far beyond what you can imagine. When I stopped drinking, it wasn't just about me. It affected my relationship with Jon, my relationship with my kids, my friendships, and even my work.

When Jon stopped drinking, that created even more ripples. Our kids are watching us prioritize our health and well-being. They're learning that you can have fun and be social without alcohol. They're seeing what it looks like to make choices based on what's good for you, not just what's expected or normal. When my clients change their relationship with alcohol, they create ripples in their families, their friend groups, their workplaces, and they become examples of what's possible.

Maybe someone's listening to this episode and they will be inspired to question their own relationship with alcohol. Maybe they'll realize they don't need it either. Maybe they'll discover what life looks like on the other side of that decision.

And that's how change happens. One person at a time, one decision at a time, one ripple at a time. So cheers to seven years of freedom from alcohol, seven years of better sleep, clearer thinking, deeper relationships, and genuine fun.

Seven years of remembering every conversation and never wondering what I said or did the night before. Seven years of not missing alcohol, even a tiny bit. If you're curious about what your life might look like without alcohol, I encourage you to follow that curiosity.

Start paying attention to how you feel when you're drinking. Start paying attention to how you feel after you've drank. Start questioning whether alcohol is adding anything positive to your life. And if you decide you want to explore changing that relationship, know that there are resources available to you.

You can certainly talk to your doctor. You can find a therapist who specializes in substance use. You can look into programs that support you. And if you're called to reach out to me, you absolutely can reach out to me. I would be honored to help you. And if I can't help you, I would be honored to help you find the resources that you need. In seven years without alcohol, I can honestly say it's one of the best decisions I've ever made. Right up there with becoming a life coach and learning to love myself through the mess that is life. Your relationship with alcohol is completely up to you. If you're questioning it, if you're curious what life might look like on the other side, trust that curiosity. It might be trying to tell you something important.

Tell me how this lands for you on my Instagram page @CoachMelissaParsonsMD. Are you questioning your relationship with alcohol? What fears do you have about changing it? And remember, you get to decide what serves you and what doesn't. You get to make changes that support your wellbeing, even if those changes feel scary at first, and maybe especially if they feel scary at first.

You get to prioritize feeling good in your body and in your life. Okay, folks, that's all for this week. I'll talk to you next week. Bye.

Hey - It’s still me. Since you are listening to this podcast, you very likely have followed all the rules and ticked off all the boxes but you still feel like something's missing! If you're ready to learn the skills and gain the tools you need to tiptoe into putting yourself first and treating yourself as you would your own best friend, I'm here to support you. As a general life coach for women, I provide a safe space, compassionate guidance, and practical tools to help you navigate life's challenges as you start to get to know and embrace your authentic self.

When we work together, you begin to develop a deeper understanding of your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. You learn effective communication strategies, boundary-setting techniques, and self-care practices that will help you cultivate a more loving and supportive relationship with yourself and others.

While, of course, I can't guarantee specific outcomes, as everyone's journey is brilliantly unique, what I can promise is my unwavering commitment to providing you with the skills, tools, support, and guidance you need to create lasting changes in your life. With humor and a ton of compassion, I'll be available to mentor you as you do the work to become a favorite version of yourself.

You're ready to invest in yourself and embark on this journey, so head over to melissaparsonscoaching.com, go to the work with me page, and book a consultation call. We can chat about all the support I can provide you with as we work together.

I am welcoming one-on-one coaching clients at this time, and, of course, I am also going to be offering the next round of group coaching soon. 

Thanks for tuning in. Go be amazing!